We have a connection! Hooray! I’m sitting in my oh-so-comfortable (L.O.L) bed here in the land of Large Stabby Needles, all hooked up to the Machine That Goes Ping and cross-eyed from reams of paperwork (”Is there any chance you might be pregnant?” takes the prize as most hilarious question thus far).

Dr. R has been in to break my water, which was a singularly unpleasant experience. As he was fishing around with his harpoon, I honestly thought I might shoot out of my skin. I don’t think he was aware of his own tenuous hold on life as he knew it, as his position beside me would have been ideal had I given in to the almost overwhelming desire to launch him from the room by his genitals.

I resisted. I’m kindly that way.

At any rate, the water has left the building and we are awaiting contractions to begin in earnest.

I thought we might have some fun and start a little poll of sorts. Let’s see who can guess the baby’s weight, shall we? Some of you have read my birth stories over the past few weeks, so you know my range (anywhere from 6lbs8oz to 8lbs11oz) and I thought it might be diverting to see who comes closest. In the interest of full disclosure, I offer this picture, taken just two weeks ago:

So what say you? Post your guess in the comments and I’ll send the winner a prize of some sort. I have no idea what. Maybe the baby’s umbilical cord stump.

Okay, maybe not.

I’ll find something fun! In the event that more than one person is right on the money, I’ll employ some highly scientific method of choosing the winner. So have at it! For now, I gotta figure out how to extricate myself from these wires so I can pee. More later!

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